Giving Each Other Accidental and Unofficial Bronchitis

There are truly few things better than wheezing with friends. Those laughs you share where you can’t breathe are some of the greatest memories in my mind. Every time, I feel like I’m going to die because at some point you start laughing at the fact you’re laughing and there is no way to get air. 
    It’s usually about something stupid, and that’s what makes it even better. Being able to cackle hysterically over something unnecessarily hilarious is what makes life worth living for. I have lost it at work, at home, at a friend’s home, in a restaurant, on the street. You really never know when the death laugh is going to hit. 
    I’ve rarely cried out of sadness in front of my friends, but boy, have I cried laughing many a time. The silence, the interruptions by the occasional gasp for breath, the accompanying tears streaming, the ending of squeaks, giggles, and exhales. I dwell as long as I can in every moment containing this scenario. The day just gets infinitely better when you have a bout of cry-laughing. Whether it’s been a shoddy day or an already lovely one, having those moments of guffawing brightens it immensely. 
    I will be chuckling to myself at work, hours later, after remembering what was so incredibly funny earlier that day. Hell, I’ll do this days or even weeks later. I’d sit in school trying to muffle my laughs. I’ll put out stock in an aisle trying to mask my grin. These wonderful moments stay with me for a long time and crop up when least expected as little bursts of pure joy. I don’t think I will ever not look back on them fondly. They keep me connected to friends and family in a sense, the ones who aren’t nearby or in my life as much anymore. I have so many memories of straight up wheezing with somebody I enjoy and those are what I fall back on whenever I need to pick myself up or I’m missing someone. 
    It’s hard when all your friends are spread out long distances, but laughter keeps us all together I think because there was at least one time where we shared a sense of humor and lost our minds over it. At some point we nearly peed ourselves as we keeled over in a fit of wheezing and cackling and guffawing. And I know that no matter the amount of years between now and that moment, no matter the distance between me and them, there was a bond at some point and it came from happiness, from sheer glee. 
    I wish upon everyone to have such moments in their lives, such memories. I think laughing is one of the greatest ways to spend time. That’s the main thing I really want to do with the people close to me. I want to feel the kind of happiness I do in those minutes every hour of every day. I at least want that feeling to be my default. I want it to replace my anxiety, rage, grief, dread, exhaustion. 
So I try, each Saturday with the boys, each time I see a friend I haven't seen in awhile, each time a family member comes over, each day at work. I try, one day at a time, to laugh my way to genuine happiness and one day, I will have done it.